And now it looked like this investment was going nowhere. If you have been in this unique type of relationship, you are probably familiar with Heather and Todd’s scenario.
Even if you’re doing well, the insights you’ll gain from this much-needed book can help you fine-tune or even completely readjust important areas of your dating life. The conversation focused on her ongoing frustration with Todd, Heather’s boyfriend for the past year.
Written by the authors of the bestselling book Boundaries, Boundaries in Dating is your road map to the kind of enjoyable, rewarding dating that can take you from weekends alone to a lifetime with the soul mate you’ve longed for. Heather cared deeply for him and was ready to pursue marriage.
At thirty-three, Todd valued his freedom and saw no reason for anything in his life to change.
Heather’s outburst was a response to something Julie had said: Heather’s words were tinted with frustration, hurt, and a good deal of discouragement.
Actually, these two elements are necessary for any successful relationship, not just dating.
Marriage, friendship, parenting, and business connections depend on freedom and responsibility in order for the attachment to flourish.By responsibility, we mean your ability to execute your tasks in keeping the relationship healthy and loving, as well as being able to say no to things you shouldn’t be responsible for. When they find it, and it matures, they often make deep commitments to each other.Responsible people shoulder their part of the dating relationship, but they don’t tolerate harmful or inappropriate behavior. Freedom and responsibility are necessary for love to develop in dating.Putting lots of emotional investment into a relationship can be dangerous.Thus, dating works best between two responsible people.She had given up activities she enjoyed; she had given up relationships she valued.