If you have children at home, dating after divorce can be a difficult thing to juggle.
Remember that you’re now their model for what dating looks like, so move forward carefully and intentionally once you do start dating.
My next stumbling block was getting into my spandex support garment (one of those shape and firm jobs that can lead to restricted breathing and intense sweating). I googled topics to discuss on the date and topics to avoid, gestures that could be seen as flirtatious and gestures that would indicate interest, how to greet your date on arrival and how to say goodbye on departure (based on three possible scenarios of course: I.e.
Between my research, my hives, extremely tight support garments and coordinating a babysitter for my little rendezvous I forgot to have fun and enjoy my first date after divorce.After my divorce, I vowed to give myself at least a three-year “healing” period before even considering a date of any sort.After he apologised for the injuries I sustained and bribed me with hot pancakes (writing his name and number on the serviette in the packet), we started chatting via our mobiles for a few days. Something I was not mentally or physically prepared for but agreed to in less than a split second.As the day of our date approached, however, I broke out in hives due to a long overdue “wax-on/wax-off” job on my legs going horribly wrong.If you realize, mid-date, that you’re not ready to date, you can give yourself more time before pursuing anything further.
If your date doesn’t call back, don’t take it personally.
It’s a sad but very real fact that about half of marriages end, so prospective partners are often prepared to date people who’ve been married before.
While you probably shouldn’t spill intimate details of your marriage’s demise on a first date, be honest and open (if/when appropriate) about the fact that you’re divorced.
Give yourself a pre-date pep talk, reminding yourself of the great qualities you have to offer. You might hear yourself saying the wrong things, or holding back in fear. Be patient, both with your dates and with yourself.
Stay positive, embrace the adventure, expect a few disappointments, and see your life as an unfolding story, one that will be worth telling. Keep an open mind, take a few deeps breaths, and go easy on yourself.
Switch up your daily routine so you’re not stuck in past patterns and ruts by default, and choose to surround yourself with the people and things that inspire you.