The concern with dating someone who has a child is that you are essentially walking smack-dab in the middle of a situation that is pretty stressful.
Think about dating someone with a child this way: You are walking into a pretty complex situation that is already created.
Sure, you as an addition to that will change the dynamic and you can help to become a part of it, but you need to a very flexible person to make the situation work with a new partner and a child who’s not yours (yet).
Prior to meeting this new person, did you know that you wanted kids?
The most promising and successful scenario in dating someone with a child involves you knowing – with no doubts or hesitations – that you want kids.
If you tend to be more of a take-charge, shot-calling personality, dating someone with a child is going to be challenging and you may not be happy because so many of the interpersonal dynamics and daily practices have already been set up.
Are you someone who gets in a fair number of fights or arguments with people, whether strangers or people you know well?Honestly I would avoid meeting the kids until you two are more serious.Any attachment you feel to them is 10x stronger the other way.As long as you start with this crucial building block – wholeheartedly wanting to be a parent – you can get to know and date that new person, and the relationship may actually work out or even morph into the kind of union you’ve always wanted.If you are on the fence about wanting kids, forcing yourself into a pre-established family adds so many pressures, and it’s not necessarily worth the hassle unless you live somewhere where there are truly few to no other dating options.If you have a history of getting confrontational or getting into arguments with others, dating someone with a child may not be a good idea.