I've dated countless women and it has always amazed me how little they know about men.
By "love" I mean deep romantic attraction, as opposed to lust or long-term attachment.Lust is primary, physical and fleeting for both sexes, and long-term attachment takes years of shared experience to develop in either sex.And if this is something you can't live without, you'd do better to break up with him now than to become more emotionally or sexually invested before breaking up with him later.------------------------------------- If you liked this post, you'll definitely like my book, Beyond the Breakup, which explains everything you need to know about dealing with you ex: what he's thinking, what is motivating him to stay friends with you, how to maximize your chances of getting him back - and if that doesn't happen, how to focus on your future.From an evolutionary biology standpoint, this makes good sense: the man who propagates his genes successfully does not need months to judge the reproductive potential of his mate, or her ability to nurture and raise children; he can see these things from physical cues, as well has her energy, moods, and her instinct to take care of him.
But the woman who propagates her genes is one who accurately judges whether the man with whom she mates is not only strong, but also stable - that is, capable of protecting and providing for her children until they are grown.
Since recognizing this difference in the sexes, I've had time to consider why it exists, and I think I have a reasonable understanding of what is going on.
The information that a man needs to trigger romantic love is information that he can perceive within a few interactions with a woman.
At most, it is a reliable source of advice for women who want to improve their chances with the opposite sex.
A reader recently asked me if I've learned anything new about women from writing this blog. To be specific, I've learned one thing - one important thing.
I speculated that the women writing to me were subject to some kind of wishful thinking or tunnel-vision, by which they focused only on the good in their boyfriend rather than the advantages of other men. A woman couldn't wishfully think herself into a degree of love so strong that she would feel compelled to write me for help.