Many parents tell children outright which racial groups they approve of them dating and which racial groups they forbid them to date. Now married to a Korean-American man, Farr had been told growing up that her boyfriends could only be German, Irish, French or Jewish.
Farr defied her parents’ dating rules because she formed genuine connections with men from minority backgrounds.
A person this insecure is unlikely to make a good partner.
As the old saying goes, you can’t love someone until you love yourself.
Although today racial minorities can largely succeed in society on their own, some elite people of color may feel the need to score a spouse from another race to boost their image or better fit into the corporate landscape.
No one should date interracially due to external pressures.
This leads some members of minority groups to experience self-hatred.
Such people are not only ashamed of their culture but of the physical features they have that reflect that culture.
If you disagree with your parents’ views on race, challenge them directly by broaching discussions about the issue with them.
And if you and your parents have other problems, don’t try to hurt them by dating interracially.
If they could erase every trait that singles them out as belonging to their minority group, they would.
Since that’s impossible, they settle for seemingly second best—coupling up with someone from a different race to make them feel better about themselves or to produce children without their telltale ethnic features.
Because the United States remains racially stratified, however, it’s considered advantageous for members of oppressed groups to pair up with those of more powerful groups.