One subtle way comes in the form of single men’s approach to single women in dating.
Most of the time I hear of & witness appropriate, intentional approaches by both men and women who are interested in one another.
I’m not saying that it is this way with all men and women, but from my own experiences and the experiences my friends and the women I counsel, single Christian men often approach women with an attitude of entitlement as opposed to an unpretentious disposition.We have commissioned men to “choose” and women to “be chosen.” These ideologies can show up in disturbing ways in approaches to dating.But they do have a couple of things in common, and one of them is that they operated in wisdom.They did what God told them to do, without trying to change who they were.Entitlement surfaces when a person feels they are owed something.
defines it as “to give (a person or thing) a title, right, or claim to something.” Synonyms for the word “entitlement” include privilege, license, due, prerogative, right, authorization.I think the weight that has been placed on these themes influences the way some single Christian men approach women in the pursuit of relationships.Historically under patriarchal systems, women were considered possessions where men traditionally controlled the lifestyles and sexuality of women.It sounds like this woman really has figured out how to have it all. What if she can’t sew or cook or hires a nanny for her kids during the week? Does that mean she’s not living up to her God-given potential as a female? And what if you don’t want to be a Proverbs 31 woman?If you have the same frustrations I do, here are some things that may help you out: Some scholars have speculated that the Proverbs 31 woman is not one woman, but rather a conglomeration of admirable attributes of several different women.In the meantime, also check out this related post on dating and this one on singleness.