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For example, at the dinner table, it is a blasphemy to serve yourself food first and immediately start eating. Unfortunately, we are influenced by what we see in the media whether we are conscious of it or not.
You serve the person you are dining with first, and always offer the last bite. Most depictions of Asian males in the popular media are not the same as their Caucasian counterparts.
But while an Asian guy’s table manners may be impeccable, other “gentlemanly” behaviours like opening the car door, helping a lady put on her jacket, etc, are not lessons that parents typically focused on teaching. The odd Jackie Chan movie as the exception, you hardly see the Asian guy as hunky, masculine star of the show.
Whereas in the 19th century, Asian men were portrayed at the other extreme in the 19th century: sexually dangerous and desirable.
Multiple articles and studies discuss how cultural stereotypes of Asian men may make them less attractive to women of all races, including Asians. On another website, one Asian male expresses: “It’s definitely harder for an Asian male to date a white female than for Asian females to date white males.
In the book Freakonomics, one study showed that single Asians (male) had to make 7,000 more annually to receive the same response rate as White men on online dating sites. Asian males are not portrayed as masculine, whereas Asian females are stereotyped as submissive, exotic.” What gives?!
The stereotype that Asian men aren’t masculine exists in a large part because of how they are portrayed in the media, not necessarily because that’s actually reflective of reality.
Myth 6: Asian guys aren’t good at expressing emotions. In Asian culture, males are not encouraged to be expressive with their emotions. For example, when a boy gets hurt and starts crying, it’s not rare to see the parents scold the child for crying.
A study conducted by China Daily interviewed a cross-section of people to see if they said “I love you” to their parents. When it comes to marriage prospects, Asian guys take into consideration the advice of his parents.
Many people interviewed had never said those three words, and one 56-year old commenting “Saying it aloud is embarrassing for me.” Of course, even in an upbringing where being emotionally expressive is not encouraged, one can still learn how to communicate feelings despite the odds. Sure, an Asian guy will think bubble tea is a perfectly acceptable venue for a first date. Asian guys will almost always say “Yes” to dessert as a date spot. It’s more common for a Caucasian male to independently pursue his desires without asking for anyone else’s approval. Although Asian guys might take awhile to confess their undying love, but that’s only because they like to take it slow.
It may sound cliché and completely unmasculine, but in Asian culture, the men are raised to always offer comfort for the female, making sure that they are provided and cared for. They might steal a kiss or two when no one’s looking, but in retrospect the Asian male would much rather prefer it behind closed doors.